|I could never express...|
He Thought She Made Him Happyas requested i left my thoughts locked up,He Thought She Made Him Happy by Lankadoodle
i left tHem there until you deemed it was safe,
you seem to have a choice to make,
and though you never asked me to, it’s one i don’t understand.
i know that you may lovE her and you’d do anything for that,
and i am just a friend that would stand by you all and all,
i see that she is important and i won’t argue with you,
but i thought i was important and you cared about me too.
now please don’t misunderstand me,
i never wanted there to be a Choice,
i thought you needed a friend and a lover,
and i knew both would make you happy.
my pride got wounded, as did my Heart,
and now my shields are up against you,
you cannot ship me off, as and when you see fit,
a friendship should never be put on hold.
she asked you to dO one difficult thing,
and you like to think you won’t,
but’s it’s obvious who you think you need,
so i’ll be the one to make it easy for you.
you once broke my heart, as i onc
20 - A Teenage Girl Fantasy“I’ll never get you back. We will never be friends again and I don’t want to be. The worst thing for me was I never knew what I did so I couldn’t defend myself and you never told me so I couldn’t explain. For me, it was just; ‘Right. That’s it. We’re not friends anymore. Oh, and I’m gonna make sure none of your other friends are either. And when you make new friends I’ll come along and I’ll take them too’ ”20 - A Teenage Girl Fantasy by Lankadoodle
She looked at me with false purplextion “What are you talking about?”
“Oh c’mon” I chuckled with little amusement “Karlie, Kristen, Lola. All the girls I was friends with in primary school. Once you and Sadie decided you didn’t want to be friends with me anymore that was it for me. They were all scared of Sadie so no-one was gonna stand up to her, and everybody loved you, so they weren’t gonna stand against you”
“I never wanted to…”
14 - Our First ChapterI remember the day you started talking to me again,14 - Our First Chapter by Lankadoodle
we had been close before, you were my first relationship,
but after an unfortunate miscommunication,
it kind of went downhill from there,
before I called you my Saviour
i remember my life was Tough,
and it started with a question as simple as “you alright?”
you never believed me when I said yes,
and being annoying and persistent as you were, you earned my trust,
before i called you my saviour,
you told me holding it in wasn’t good,
that it would just bring more pain,
you offered me your shoulder and your advice,
you became my friend in that french class,
before i called you my saviour.
you let me into your Life and your heart,
you lead me to Love and compassion,
you showed me that friendship could be two-sided,
you proved me that you could be trusted,
before i called you my saviour.
it wasn’t long until you called me your best friend,
and it wasn’t long until i realised you were Mine,
you shared with me,
3 - Your Waythere are so many things i want to tell you,3 - Your Way by Lankadoodle
so many things i keep inside,
i may be out of order and completely out of place,
but my heart still aches when i think of what you’ve done,
and what you should have done instead.
i know it wasn’t Easy to have somebody like me,
i’m messed up and i mess up,
it must be hard to have tried to fix me,
before you even realised i was broken,
and there are things i should have done instead.
i believe you did the best you thought you could,
but i wonder if you eVer considered trying harder?
did you ever think to you may be doing it wrong?
i know you saw the damaged goods that i became,
did you ever stop to think and look a little closer?
the punishments you dished out,
were often more than i could take,
the words you failed to say,
and the feelings you failed to Express,
lead me down a lonely road of self-hate.
i broke right in front of you,
i wanted you to see the scars i made myself,
did you Not notice, or did you just ignore?
I really thought we were best friends. I thought we would be friends for a long time, but friends don’t do this. Friends don’t drop each other, and I am not okay with it.
It’s a story about an explanation I’ll never get.
This one’s a little different as it’s not a poem. But honestly, this seemed like the only way I could truly express how I feel about this situation. Writing this helped me a lot because the last line of this was never true. Until I finished this piece.
“It would have been better if you were never born.”